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Tuesday, January 24, 2012

"Performing" Gender?

In a recent comment on another blog... I was accused of both "performing" gender, and "fronting". I sat here scratching my head, trying to decipher what the other commenter was trying to say. Especially since it was said as an insult. I think most of us "perform" gender in one way or another... I've never met anyone truly androgynous, although, I'm sure there are some people who try to refrain from any gender performance. I think we all know by now, or can acknowledge that gender is a social construct. Society attempts to assign a gender to all of us as we enter this world, and sometimes that gender assignment meshes with our biological sex - sometimes it doesn't. As k.d. lang (who I am a HUGE fan of) once told Barbara Walters in an interview, when asked why she dresses in masculine clothing, "clothes are just things we drape over our bodies". Why does it even have to be considered "gender performance"? Can we not all just wear what we like? I find it interesting that someone from the trans hating camp, who works so hard at showing why Butches should not be called "masculine" just because of how they dress or how they wear their hair (gender performance) would turn around and accuse someone else of gender performance. You're completely contradicting yourself! Here's the deal - I am not biologically male. I can't change that. I can choose which gender I feel most comfortable with, and I did. I don't choose clothing based on anything besides personal taste. Some days that's jeans and a kickass cowboy hat, some days it's cargo shorts and a t-shirt - some days it may be the very fancy shiny metallic silver shirt I found at a thrift store recently, that my daughter thinks looks like a girl's shirt. I couldn't care less if it looks "feminine" - it's a fabulous shirt that I can't wait to wear out! I don't choose my clothing according to gender rules just because I transitioned genders, and I didn't transition genders because of the clothing I liked. Plenty of men and women wear clothing that some might consider inappropriate for their gender and DON'T transition. Clothing does not make the man, OR woman. I wear things that I like, and I don't think about what people will think of me when I wear them. I don't care if what I'm wearing makes me looks masculine or feminine. So no, I wouldn't label how I dress, as a performance. I don't think clothing should be assigned to a particular gender. I would like to see a society in which everyone could wear WHATEVER they liked, and not be questioned or told that they're performing anything. Maybe I'm obtuse, but I honestly don't get the big deal over other people's identities. Why does it matter if a person decides not to identify with the gender they're assigned at birth? Why can't we allow one another the freedom to be whoever we want to be? We force one another into boxes all the time in this society and I don't understand why we can't live and let live. Seriously.

4 comments:

  1. this is my question as well. the freedom to be who we want to be, and think how we choose as well.

    nothing pleases me more than people 'not' following the herd.

    this is what pleases me.

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  2. "I think we all know by now, or can acknowledge that gender is a social construct."

    versus

    "Society attempts to assign a gender to all of us as we enter this world, and sometimes that gender assignment meshes with our biological sex - sometimes it doesn't."

    BIG contradiction here.

    If gender is a "social construct", HOW can it "mesh"/"align" with our sex? It can't because gender is a CONSTRUCT, does not exist, it is not some blurb inside your head.

    If you believe gender is a construct and everybody is (or should be) free in their expresisons, why sex change?
    I don't identify with my "gender" but since gender does not exist (as you just said) I do see exactly zero reason for a sex change. DUH.

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  3. Sorry to burst your bubble - but there is no DUH moment here... by saying that society's gender assignment may or may not reflect who a person is - is not agreeing that we should have a gender construct. I didn't say gender does not exist - I stated that it is socially constructed. It exists but none of us have to abide by it.

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  4. anonymous @ 12:57 - the duh! is on you mate, as extro stated, just because society imposes gender on us doesn't mean we have to buy into/accept it, just as extro saying it may or may not match who we are isn't saying he agrees with it. i also fail to see where he is saying it doesn't exist at all.

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